My Bible saves me from hassle.

 am traveling by air to my grandfather's funeral today. While my luggage was being searched by the TSA, they found a fork and knife in my backpack I accidentally left there from my last camping trip. Oops. I fully expected them to strip search me, etc. and confiscate my silverware.

What do you know? The dude with the blue gloves took out my big thick Catholic Bible from my backpack, and after removing my fork and knife (a regular table knife, relatively blunt edge), he put all of it back and wished me a nice day.

I am stupid. But God is gracious. And some TSA agents have common sense and grace of their own.